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Becoming a Better You
Written by Elliott Roberts   
Saturday, 12 July 2008 02:09
If happiness comes from within, then why does it seem so difficult for so many people to find contentment with themselves? Often times it is because they have been conditioned over time to believe in the negative image they have of themselves. Poor self esteem and personal insecurities haunt many people. Self concept or self identity comes from persistent assessment of ones self, however, too many times this assessment is based on the false perceptions and distorted images. Over time, the distorted image becomes reality.
by ElliottRoberts


If happiness comes from within, then why does it seem so difficult for so many people to find contentment with themselves? Often times it is because they have been conditioned over time to believe in the negative image they have of themselves. Poor self esteem and personal insecurities haunt many people. Self concept or self identity comes from persistent assessment of ones self, however, too many times this assessment is based on the false perceptions and distorted images. Over time, the distorted image becomes reality.

A fear of failure or fear of not succeeding in life can also be a major stumbling stone in self esteem issues. While many women believe this thought absurd, the reality remains that women are more self critical when it comes to their self ratings of success than in any other aspect of their lives. When holding on to the thought that success needs to be the starting point for happiness, that happiness is rarely found.

The self-esteem issues and fear of failure may be the only two things that are standing between you and your life of happiness. But, in order to bridge that gap, you must first recognize that these are the reasons you are unhappy and try to focus on improving that self-esteem and those fears of taking risks and succeeding. Once those are overcome, a healthy self image will follow.

Self improvement can encompass your physical, emotional, and mental being. What area or areas do you want to improve and why do you want to improve those areas? The latter may seem like a silly question but it is important. For example, if you want to lose weight because you want to look like your favorite movie star, then you may find trouble reaching your goal as it may not be realistic and it may not provide enough motivation. However, if you want to lose a few pounds to reach a healthy weight because your doctor says you are at risk for heart disease; then that, coupled with the smile of your precious child whom would be lost without you, may be enough motivation to loose the pounds and run a marathon when you reach your goal weight!

The physical side of improvement can often be the least difficult of the three. Increasing your exercise levels and toning the body, even weight loss, will have such an effect that self esteem and thus happiness will instantly rise. A great looking body is at the heart of all self-esteem and without that feeling of healthiness and pride in your body, happiness will not follow.

The emotional aspects of happiness are a bit more difficult to change and require careful time and attention to the details of our past, present and future. Our lives are rooted in the emotional fractures that have created the psyche was now possess. Releasing the hold these fractures have on our present day lives is needed to fulfill our destination of happiness.

The changes needed in our mental state are often those that run concurrently with the emotional changes. Mentally we judge ourselves based on expectations only we understand. If we never achieve those goals we create a negative self image that will wreak havoc on our chances of happiness. Removing all boundaries and definitions of success will greatly improve our chances of happiness.

Life without balance and self-esteem will be life without happiness. The happiness we want and desire is rooted in our need to be better that we are right now and better than everyone else around us. Without a doubt, once we refocus our lives on the things that matter the most, our bodies, our hearts and our minds, the rest will fall into place an happiness will be achieved.

About the Author:

 

Stephen Meyer

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